jus come out of the bath room... jus break down in the bath room.... the running tap wash away my tears and left me with a feeling that i cant find a word to describe it.... there is too many missing pieces in my life.... i am totally a failure in everything... and i feel so useless, hopeless... donno noe wat to do... i feel so sorry for my parents.... i really miss brother.... i really wish he will be there for me... but i noe, i will never even see him again.... i wan to keep my promise till the never end... but i need the strengh... i so worry i will forget eveything about him... i miss you... is a ready 6 years.... and i jus cant let go.... looking back to the past.... my tears will simply roll down my cheeks.... sometime i wan to leave this place.... and start all over again at somewhere ...... don dare to mention it bcoz scare my dad and mon will worry for me and i don wan to bring back their pain too... seeing ppl with sibling... really hurt me deeply and painfully.... and all i can do is to pretend normal... i really wish i can have someone that can clearly see through me... noe wat i am think... be there for me... stand beside me and guide me all the way... never give up on me.... encourage me..... not even my parents can see through me.... alway keeping thing to myself and not sharing it... i starting to see my mom's shadow and my brother's shadow inside me... can someone kind please bring me out of it... from everything.... before i change to someone else..... when will i find my happiness?


saw junhao, alvin, jian liang, kenneth in bugis.... is really nice to see them...(from the bottom of my heart) even though we start shooting each other when we meet.... really wish there is another gather where everyone is there....
my life is work, study, sleep and eat......
I would want to live longer...